Half-Century

So, this lady on my left is 50 years old. It was her birthday yesterday. She is at times wonderful, at times stern, at times highly witty, at times deathly serious. She has been a mentor. She has been a partner in watching more Smallville, The Mentalist, CSI, Bones, and random crime shows than I’d like to admit to. She has helped me push myself when I needed a little encouragement. She has held me back when I needed to exercise caution. She is none other than my mother.

People always use the phrase “mommy’s boy” as a derogatory term for a wimp, someone who always backs out at the last moment, citing some lame excuse. Were I a perfect reflection of my mother, that is far from the person that I would be. My mother knows fear, but she uses it to make herself stronger. When she sees that she is afraid, she knows that she is expanding herself beyond her previous limits. And there is nothing she enjoys more than that.

I have more happy memories with my mother than I can count or try to remember. Everything from grand trips we have taken together (like walking the streets of Paris in the space of two days) to many a lazy night at home, watching some mindless television show, trying to predict whodunnit. She also broke the only bone that has ever been broken in my body by falling onto my leg and causing it to be cleft in twain. She claims that I was being a spoiled brat at the time, making a fuss about a toy another kid got at their birthday party. As I am prone to obsessions, I can believe this. Unlike her supposed, short-lived career as an aerobics instructor.

It will be her birthday celebration on Tuesday evening, and arguably the first such event that I will not be attending. This year is a big year for my family, in terms of birthdays. I turned twenty-five, my little brother turned twenty-one, and my mother turned fifty. The fact that I cannot be with my family to celebrate these milestones is one of the hardest parts of working abroad. I am sure it will get easier, but missing such major celebrations does dampen my spirits a little as they roll around. Tuesday will be a sad, lonely day in Korea.

I wish I could be there, but I can’t. Having two week’s leave at inflexible times of the year is the bane of every teacher in Korea’s existence. My thoughts will be far away from the small children I take care of on that day. They will be centred around the cozy home and school where all of our closest friends and family will gather to celebrate my mom’s and my brother’s birthday. So, until we meet again in less than two weeks, I say this to you, mom:

I love you. Never change who you are. I’m sorry about turning your hair brown because you became pregnant with me. I can’t wait to see you again.

This is Halloween

South Africa doesn’t really do Halloween. Sure, there are a few drunken parties organised for people in their twenties with too much disposable income. But there is very little tangible excitement for the Americanised ‘traditional’ Halloween – trick-or-treating, bobbing for apples, dressing up in creative costumes that don’t have ‘sexy’ in the title. As an American cultural colony, Korea believes Halloween to be a rather big deal indeed. As today was the last day of school before the actual celebration tomorrow, we celebrated at our school with a suitably festive, fun amalgamation of Halloween classics. It can be said that Kris and I have had our first true Halloween. And it was pretty great.

The day started normally, with the usual farcical ceremony of waving at the kids as they walk the 20-metre passage from where they leave their bus to the elevator that will take them to the school. However, today’s bus duty was a little different. With each new child came a new costume, and a new reaction to the costumes of the teachers. The teacher’s costumes varied greatly, from a low-budget Batguy (similar to but legally distinct from Batman) to a scary skull-face, to my own outfit (which shall remain a secret due to it being re-used for Halloween Hat this weekend – no spoilers!). As such, the children’s reactions ranged from bemusement to laughter to nervousness. Each one was unique, each one was priceless. It is at times like that that one can truly see the beginnings of complex human existence, as they grapple with something unexpected.

From here, there was a little bit of free class time before the inter-class trick-or-treating began. This ceremony carried a typical taint of laziness, but was a heap of fun nonetheless. Essentially, the classes were split into pairs. In each pair, one class would go and knock on the door of the other class, say ‘Trick or treat!’, and be bombarded in equal measure by candy from the foreign teacher and flashlight photography from the Korean co-teachers. As with the majority of the events of the day, it was simple but enjoyed by all parties.

Once all of the classes had received their treats, they returned to their rooms. Here, the children gave each other some of the candy they had been instructed to bring to share amongst their classmates. This ensured that each child left the school with an obesity-inducing amount of candy. I was happy to receive only a small share of what was doled out. I received enough to get a taste of each, but not enough to want to visit the doctor in the building to check my blood sugar levels.

Following this, the school ventured, class-by-class, to go trick-or-treat at the local candy store in the square nearby the school building. Each class would ride the elevator down to the ground floor, walk out in the cold, and line up neatly in the sweet shop. Here, the children took turns to say ‘trick or treat’ to the shopkeeper, and receive more candy to toss atop their hoards. It is possible but unconfirmed that Halloween is endorsed by the dentists of Dongtan. Sadly, I have neither the resources nor the time to investigate this claim.

With the kindergarten trick-or-treating concluded, the costume contest began. Here, I realized the true dedication of Korean parents. The children were almost all dressed in lavish, expensive-looking costumes.

These included:

• muscled versions of Captain America, Hulk, Spider-Man, and Iron Man.
• Six Cinderallas.
• Three Elsas and one Anna (from Frozen).
• Four ghosts.
• At least eleven variants on the witch theme, ranging from cat witch to witch-princess mixture.
• Two Minnie Mouses (Mice?). One of these looked considerably more like Mad Moxxi from the Borderlands game series, which gave some of us teachers a chuckle.
• One Grim Reaper costume which clearly cost more than R1000.
• One Maleficent (which looked more like a wingless purple bat, but was still quite cute).
• Zero children who did not dress up in a costume.

Many of the costumes were clearly not hand-crafted, and were simply purchased and put on. Others were mish-mashes of multiple costumes thrown together. There was, of course, the sheet ghost. What would any Halloween be without a child wearing a costume no more elaborate than a sheet with holes cut into it?

The final part of the Halloween festivities for the kindergarten children was playing bobbing for apples. For those unfamiliar with this particular game, a child must attempt to eat a slice of apple floating in about 2 centimeters of water inside a small, flat dish, without using their hands. Doesn’t sound like traditional bobbing for apples? Well, let’s call it a variant. Children were pitted off against each other to see who could perform this feat the quickest. It was quite hilarious to watch the children struggle to gather the apple into their mouth, particularly those who had lost their front teeth and were waiting for their new set to grow. Great fun was had by all.

With their bags full of candy and smiles on their faces, the kindergartners were sent on their way. They made way for the elementary children. Costumes were rarer here, with a number of children not dressing up at all. The celebrations took the entirety of their time, with no time to complete any work. The elementary children also ventured to the sweet shop for trick-or-treating, and also thoroughly enjoyed bobbing for apple slices. Their festivities had one additional activity – balloon javelin. This entailed the children throwing small foam sticks with sharp metal points at the end, attempting to pop balloons strewn across the gym floor. Despite the safety hazard, it was a lot of fun, and all of the kids seemed to enjoy it. Once the games were done, it was time for the elementary students to go, and our first school Halloween to come to a close.

It was a draining experience. Running all of the games, trick-or-treats, and contests took it out of all of the teachers. Not one of us complained. It was a wonderful day, and it flew by for all of us. Some kids will be sick tomorrow. Some teachers will be sleeping in late, exhausted from the activities of the day. But today is definitely one of the highlights of Korea so far. I look forward to the next Halloween far more keenly than I would have before seeing the events of today. Let’s hope that it will be at least half as good as today. That would still be better than any Halloween I’ve experienced in South Africa.