Bonding and Re-bonding

I sit at Incheon airport, a place that has become strangely familiar to me over my time in Korea. Even though I normally only spend a few hours here with each visit, I find that there is far less change here than the rest of Korea. Restaurants and shops have largely remained in their same places. The procedures are generally the same. The process of arrive, check in the bags, go through security, go through immigration, find the gate, wait for the plane, then leave gives me some small comfort in the otherwise moderately stressful act of travelling.

For this visit, Kris and I will be returning to South Africa, mostly for her best friend’s wedding. I say mostly so as not to offend all of the South African-based friends and family that we will see while we are there. It’s also to see all of you, I swear!

This will be the second time that we’ve visited South Africa since we left for Korea and I started this blog. Last time was for our own wedding, and for a much longer period of time. With this visit, we will be staying for less than two weeks, and trying to cram in as many lunches, brunches, dinners, board games, Ultimate games, family meetups, and general socializing as we possibly can in that time. In our last visit, we had a much more relaxed social timetable, because we could afford it. We also were lucky enough to see a large portion of the significant people in our lives at the wedding.

While things might not have changed too much at Incheon airport, a great deal has changed in our family and friend situation back in South Africa. My entire immediate family will be working outside of South Africa before the end of this year. Kris’ mom has moved out of their long-time family home. Over our time in Korea, we have lost contact with many of our friends back in South Africa, with each year causing more friendships to fade from vivid experiences to sepia-toned memories. This is the nature of life. Situations change, and you have to adapt to your new environment.

However, we are excited to return and get in touch with everyone that we might have neglected to video chat or message in the past few months, or even years. We will undoubtedly have many a story to share with each other. There will also be those that we cannot meet up with, whether that be because of scheduling problems, distance, or even just sheer forgetfulness. Maybe this will cause a few more friendships to lose their luster, or maybe agonizing over the missed opportunity will be the splash of colour that livens a bond that was dulling.

Kris and I are both excited to be returning to the place that was once the only place we called home. Our lives are more diverse now, and we will be leaving our Korean home for a while to nestle back into our South African one. Oh, and eat our body weight in biltong, Cadbury’s and Gino’s.

Fellowships, Old and New

To come to Korea, Kris and I left our South African friends behind. It was a painful thing to do for both of us. While we may not have the widest friendship circles, we have formed deep bonds with a number of people. It is the desire to see these friends and our families that is the primary force drawing us back to South Africa. However, as we have spent more time in Korea, we have bonded with others here. Sadly, this weekend, we had to say goodbye to a pair that we have grown remarkably fond of. Even though we only knew them for a couple of months, we forged a friendship that will (hopefully) last a long time.

The lovable gent in the cover photo is Holm. He is a scholar, a gentleman, and, occasionally, a model for the fashion properties of pumpkin pie. It is Holm and his lovely girlfriend Kristy that we had to say goodbye to.We spent yesterday with them, doing what we love to do best – eating, playing board games, and talking about everything and nothing. We met at a sushi restaurant, walked over to play Munchkin at a nearby bakery, then ventured to a Western-style restaurant for our final meal together. It was a fitting end to chapter one of our friendship. When we parted, I was fighting off tears. I will miss them both immensely.

Today, on the other hand, was a day of bonding for both Kris and I. Kris went to have a bitch and stitch (a feminine gathering where they knit and catch up) with one of her close friends, Robyn. She will also be leaving Korea next March, but that is a tale for another post. I spent my day writing and gaming, before Kris returned home and we had a Skype session with this scalliwag:

Findlay Matheson. The only thing longer than his hair is his influence in my life. Findlay is my oldest friend. He and I often spend hours talking about inanities that most of humanity would abandon after mere moments. Tonight’s Skype was a brief discussion about his brother’s partner’s pregnancy, general catch-up, and an intricate discussion of XCOM: Enemy Unknown. Yes, we have our priorities completely correct. Words, even my words, cannot describe how much this man means to me.

Friends are important in keeping ourselves sane. Or at least suitably, functionally insane. New friends such as Holm and Kristy and old friends such as Findlay help me keep touch with exactly how much we have accomplished in our time in Korea. This is a formative part of my life, with decisions that I make now likely having far-reaching implications into my future. With friends like these, I know I will be guided on the correct path for me. They say if one can hold a friendship for seven years, it will last a lifetime. I have been friends with Findlay for more than twenty. I foresee Holm and Kristy reaching similar lengths. I cannot wait for the moments that I will share with these, and all of our other, friends in the future.

Whether we stay in Korea for a long time or come home after our next contract, it is friends that will help us along the way, and friends that will be there to cheer us on as we reach our dreams. Whatever the future holds, Kris and I will face it with input from our friends. Thank you for always being there for us.